*sigh* what a bad depressing day.. If I could change the layout and colour scheme of my blog any darker, I would.. but I think that would be really detrimental to the eyes of my dear friends who read this blog instead of tp's blog to get updates on my life..

Ever since I lost my scholarship last sem I haven't really given much thought to it.. until now, when the first sem's $3k plus school fees were deducted from my parents' account.. And what a bad day to break the news too.. apparently last night on a joyous trip to town for shopping and dinner which included my dad, mum and sis, quickly degenerated into what my sis termed, "a brawl". No wonder she sms'ed me late last night asking what to do..

My dad exploded at my mum yesterday when he found out about my bro going to Taiwan with his army friends.. he has this very negative impression of them, yelling on about how my mum was gullible enough to think that my bro's going for a holiday.. how they are actually going to go whoring, drinking and might even get into trouble with the triads there.. how exaggerated.. I'm quite certain my bro isn't that dumb..

But I gather that from the recent incident of my bro turning up home carried by two of his friends after his birthday bash made drunk by his friends.. and even left his specs in the club.. so most prob my dad figures it might happen in Taiwan and he get robbed or smth.. *hai* times I got drunk my friends brought me to their place.. And I always made sure I appeared home sober and ok.. should've let my bro know..

At least my sis is still matured enough to try and mediate this brawl.. and decided not to go to Taiwan with my mum anymore already.. Though I feel real bad for my mum.. who bore the brunt of everything.. though she had nothing to do with it. Not to mention being totally disappointed cuz she always wanted to go to Taiwan.. after 20 years.. Add on to that my additional financial drain now.. *sigh*

When I told my dad he just merely said, "what to do, pay la. Told you not to do so much nonsense already," with a tone a concoction of resignation and restrained anger. I felt like crap.

So all I can do now is to find more money to earn, and earn them, to help relieve that financial burden.. how dumb of me to squander that scholarship amounting to almost $30k away just like that.. when in year one you're supposed to score. right now I guess I can only look for more sources of $$ and reduce my own spending.. (which I am doing already..)

ok enough of depressing posts.. thank goodness for tp being here =) she's been absolutely lovely -muack muack-